Thursday, July 06, 2006

Say goodbye to my little friend!

I think I forgot to tell you guys that I had a minor surgery this morning (probably because I myself forgot about it until late last night). So minor, in fact, we'll just call it a "procedure." Today I look like this:


Hot, right? I get to wear my awesome stitches for an entire 10 days. I can't wait to see how many times I have to answer the question "what happened to your neck?" Maybe I should just tell people it was vampires and see what they say. That would be awesome.

Anyway, I went in this morning, starving, (I mean, I'm practically always starving when I wake up, but this morning I was really starving, must be the huge dinner I had at Mi Piaci last night... mmmmmm) because I had to get some anesthesia, and I'm just never sure how that's going to affect my tummy. Afterwards I decided that I really needed Chik-fil-A. There ar obvious reasons why I never lose any weight, eh? I justified it in that I had to drive myself to and from surgery so I deserved a treat, in the form of fast food, natch. It was too early for strips or nuggets, so I had to (twist my arm) get a Chik'n Biscuit. Fried chicken on a buttermilk biscuit!?!! Those yankees don't know what they're missing. It's fried chicken on a buttermilk biscuit! Breakfast of champions! I successfully talked myself into throwing away half the biscuit but damn, if it wasn't incredibly satisfying anyway. So in honor of my awesome fried chicken on a buttermilk biscuit... Keira Knightly, ... please eat a hamburger.


What is going on with Hollywood these days? Keira has always been a cute girl, if a little thin for my personal taste, but seriously? Who finds this attractive? Where are her boobs? Where are her ARMS? Pirates took them and left her with toothpicks? Are we supposed to be able to count ribs through concave chest cavities? Is the entirety of Hollywood anorexic now?

Take a hint from Katherine Heigl and her smokin'-hot bod: women are curvy.

10 comments:

Gina said...

Salma is so hot I want to bite her, and I'm a girl.

I've loved your posts of late J. *kiss* I totally think you need to go with the vampire thing.

Bee said...

Ummm. . .buttermilk biscuit. I'm suddenly starving.

Hey, what happened to your neck? ; )

krysten said...

haha, i just saw this pic of kiera today ...ack!! how could you look at yourself in the mirror prior to going to a major picture-taking event and think "yeah, this is TOtally not disgusting!", seriously. yuck!

pshaw! Katherine Heigl is BARELY curvy!! i mean come on!! her arm isnt any bigger than kieras! you're dead on with salma though. only person better (IMO) is Catherine Zeta Jones, who is totally my cross-over choice. HOT.

Brain Diva said...

I hope the neck heals well, and I agree that vampire bite would make for a good story! Plus, who knows if Mulder wouldn't come rescue you? ;)

Anonymous said...

the vampire story would be funny, but it's not believable and so you would still have to explain what happened. you should come up with a weird explanation that is plausible, and see how far you can go with it(ex. bullet grazed your neck during a botched bank robbery). you are so right about the skinny hollywood stars these days, as they are not attractive in the least. give me a girl with curves and and a healthy looking body anyday.

hello jamie: said...

midwestboy, I love the bullet grazing story!! I am so using that! Starting tomorrow, as the bandaid I'm currently sporting is hurting my thin neck-skin much more than the actual stitches.

Who are you anyway? Do I know you? And why don't you believe in vampires? :)

Anonymous said...

lol, of course i believe in vampires. daniel malloy's interview convinced me of that. i'm just thinking that the vast majority may not subscribe to that same belief. my name is todd, and no, you don't know me. i came upon your blog awhile back and found it interesting and funny, so i've kept coming back to keep up. :)

hello jamie: said...

awesome! thanks for reading!

hello jamie: said...

Krys, doesn't your husband think Catherine Zeta-Jones and Salma Hayek are the same person?

krysten said...

yes, along with teri hatcher.

*shrugs*

oh, and Sela Ward too...